the new neighbour
landlocked in a country gerrymandered
to our agreeable shape of rationality,
i am so merry under my blue sky,
so bloody proud of my nationality!
yes, i'm loads of fun at parties—
love to taste all the imported stuff
and make a drunken portmanteau
of loanwords to hide my pretty bluff!
put simply: ‘til you've gone anticlockwise,
don't preach that magna carta is fair;
the ball's rightfully in my court, so
salute the king of the four square!
oh, i read the papers, i know my enemy,
and it's downright awful what's to come!
so i'll do my part, i'll be brave and blind
‘til we're clean of all the scum!